Bing’s truly reprehensible line “Don’t you have a little too much penis to be wearing a dress like that?” (Like Susan and Carol before her, Helena’s story is not her own her characterization is limited to only those traits which most humiliate Chandler.) (Despite this cruelty and emotional manipulation, Chandler offers her no apology.) If she even has a name besides “Charles” (or her objectively excellent drag name, “Helena Handbasket,” which I’ll use from here on), viewers never learn it, the better to aggressively misgender her in “The One With Chandler and Monica’s Wedding Part 1.” Upon cresting the threshold at the rehearsal dinner, Helena is immediately subjected to a barrage of deadnaming and implicit misgendering from her ex-wife and son, including Mrs. Chandler, we discover in “The One With Chandler’s Dad,” has been actively avoiding a relationship with his father for years, even ghosting her when she traveled to Manhattan seeking reconciliation. If we assume that Chandler’s father is a trans woman and not a cis drag queen, it becomes all the more apparent that she is a walking punchline. In fact, with the benefit of hindsight, it’s easy to see how the show bolstered homophobia and transmisogyny in our culture for years to come. And though it’s tempting to give the show some slack because of its cultural context, that doesn’t actually excuse any of its toxicity.
Friends is more than just a goofy series of contrivances based on hyperbolically strict standards of heteronormativity it’s a show about being regularly harassed and humiliated for performing a queer sexual or gender identity, mainly by one’s closest confidants. From what I could tell, Friends was a show about Straight People Antics mainly consisting of bad romantic communication, slavish devotion to gender roles, and a shiny veneer of mid-twenties promiscuity.īut last week, as I sat down to intentionally watch the show for the first time, I realized I’d been wrong about the show. Offhandedly seeing a few episodes with friends over the years did nothing to improve its reputation. Iconic though it may be, the show’s core concept - a group of inexplicably well-off pals mocking and horndogging at each other ad infinitum - always bored me to tears.
Before I saw a single episode of Friends, I knew that I would hate it.